Yes Lawd!

Written 09/08/22

Published 11/20/23

Some people pray to God when they feel small. I pretend to talk to my idols in my head. It's the same thing. And it's real.

Here I am sitting thinking about my music career, and how I want nothing more than to learn, to become, to inspire others to do the same. And then when the daydream is over, I have this moment where I faintly ask myself:

"Who was I just talking to?" Myself, of course, but in that moment, I felt that there was another answer. In one way or another, I realized that Anderson .Paak was sitting there listening to me, in my daydream, understanding my emotion and empathizing.

I never consciously had the idea "I want to pretend Anderson .Paak is here," it was kind of just implied. It is a natural part of my thinking process. And it is the same thinking process when people pray to God, or any idealized model of value.

Often the person across from me is one of my parents, depending on the type of situation, emotional or logical.

What I want to emphasize is the feeling of being "small" in relationship to someone or something greater, the "son" to the "Father" that is God or Mom or Anderson .Paak.

The relationship represents 0 striving towards 1. This is chaotic energy, the feeling of being small, lost, confused; energy that manifests goal-oriented, masculine behavior.

Goals can be good or bad. Chaotic energy can also be good or bad. This example highlights the negative aspect of chaotic energy, the divine feminine.

When life is good, the answer is to do nothing. Or do anything. Do whatever you want. This is positive chaotic energy. This is art, music, passion.

When life is bad you pray to God. When life is good you praise God. You are that which receives, in relation to that which is greater than you.

If you decide not to look up to anyone or anything, you will just do whatever it is that you do anyways.